Lately, I’ve been thinking about my childhood. Childhood memories and relationship habits have a way of sticking with us. So much so that I genuinely believe we are all children on the inside. And yes, this includes your boss, the person you most envy, the person you most respect, and everyone else.

At some points on our life journey we should realize that identity and treat it kindly. We are all trying to fit in, make our way through life without getting picked on, and seeking some form of acceptance. We also have a much greater capacity for joy, and creativity, and love than we give ourselves credit for. I know it’s sort of strange to think this way but I find myself getting emotional every time I think of the “Little Parron” inside. Even though I have a beard as long as my father had in his 60s, I still have those moments of insecurity from my youth. That’s why I feel we all should give our inner child a Big Ole Hug!

As a testament to this, I thought long and hard about how to design something that would allow me to embrace my inner child - literally and figuratively, in a way that was both ironic and sincere. Whether we use them as the source for music and videos, the device we read text messages and emails on, or the camera that captures serious moments in our grownup lives, cell phones are our most intimate and ubiquitous accessories. Mine is always with me and connected to me one way or another, so a phone case seemed the perfect canvas.

I designed my inner child phone case with a picture of me from grade school. It’s an image I once thought was the most hideous depiction of who I was as a kid. I was ashamed of my big round head and the badly broken front tooth that I was trying desperately to hide behind tightly clenched lips, curling into an anxious smile. I used to hide the picture from my friends whenever they’d come over to play. When I moved to New York after college I made sure to leave the picture and the memories behind me, or so I had thought.

“Still, when it looked like the sun wasn’t gonna shine anymore, God put a rainbow in the clouds.”

Maya Angelou

During a holiday visit to see my dad before he passed away, George got a chance to see this infamous picture on a bookshelf where my Mom kept family portraits and “us kids’” graduation photos. There’s even one of me graduating preschool holding my diploma in one hand and making a big fist of achievement with the other - a forced gesture my Dad thought would make the Polaroid more impactful. I suppose that’s where I get my love of dramatic photography from. I didn’t realize it at the time, but George took a picture of it and set it as my caller ID picture.

When I found out he did it I was horrified, but he told me he loved the image! That, of course, forced me to take a second look at it. I was forced to look back at my younger self for the first time in years and finally saw ME! That’s Parron. The one who was picked on for drawing all the time, so soft spoken that he’d just rather not speak at all. The one who never understood sports and always managed to get hit by the baseball, despite his Dad being the best Baseball coach in Holmes County. Who would have known that the boy they use to call “sorry sissy boy” would turn into the man he is today!( that took a lot out of me to say!) I cry as I write/read this! Oye!

The scars of the past have a way of still hurting. But I cannot forget my inner child without also losing all that is good about him, either. Those quiet years drawing - teaching myself about art and beauty by shear dint of my own imagination because we didn’t have art classes. Maya Angelou once quoted/sang in one of my favorite speeches, “Still, when it looked like the sun wasn’t gonna shine anymore, God put a rainbow in the clouds.” That makes me smile! Sometimes our inner child can be our own rainbow and embracing it visibly allows me and my inner child to be a rainbow to other people’s clouds. That past life made me stronger and who I am today is a testament to the little kid I once was.

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